Cancelled :(

Read my blog from last week where I thought I was all over this and confident, a manic ending to a manic year huh? What a blow.

If it weren’t for a couple of big blows at the same time I’d go for it still. I probably will at some point, my written doesn’t expire until June of 2022 so I still have time. I used to have a go for it and prove everyone wrong attitude, I don’t have that right now. I’m in take my bat & ball & go home mode about a lot of things. Show up for the game excited about it, be told you suck, then walk of shame home.

The big thing here too is the cost for a week of flying, that was the biggest dream squasher. I expected maybe 2 more flights, wasn’t being unrealistic about that. I haven’t been cheap about this, but there is a point where you have to be realistic about the cost too for what you’re trying to get out of it.

When the kids were little I was thinking about going to law school. Got the LSAT test date, was studying and going to some open houses for the schools. A few of my friends were lawyers, but once they had kids they hated it and quit. I would have missed most of my oldest son’s high school experience and my youngest son’s childhood, then what if I hated it like they did? At the time too, it was hard for me to work (for money) because some family emergency would come up and I would have to quit my job. I didn’t take the test and I don’t regret it.

Instead, I coached the local high school volleyball and golf teams. I worked part time at the golf course which was paying for my most expensive hobby at the time. They were very flexible with me, gave me a shift where my kids wouldn’t even know I was gone since I got off at 1pm to pick them up from school and take them to their sports. They got jobs at golf courses, it was great for them too.

I’m sure I’ll pick this up again when I get through some family hurdles in Feb., it might be a few months until I have the time to do this again. Already the week I had planned to be solo to study turns out that they don’t go back to New Mexico until the day before the scheduled (now unscheduled) test anyway. Still on wife/mom/daughter duty for a few more months that are going to be kicked into high gear soon.

It’s kind of like this COVID shut down, now extended in CA indefinitely again. A few more weeks, months, years….& now I’m 58. My next life I’m going to be a man.

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